Week 1 Day 2 C25K behind me

I did not make any excuses. Even though I got home after 9:30 (late school start day) and had a ton of things to do, I popped the chicken breasts in the crock pot with all ingredients and ran out of the house for my week 1 day 2 couch-to-5-K training. 

I really really enjoy it. 

I am also a little motivated by this friendly competition with my husband. 
He said that if i run he will run, so my excuse to actually do it is to either be better than him or just keep him healthy (he has really difficult sleep and stress issues and this running is actually very helpful for him). 

It is amazing how good I feel with this training. I don't know why I stopped. 
I think i just let myself get bored, or just let myself tell myself that I am bored. I kept doing the same streets but who cares! I am feeling so great! I have flexibility with my time and as long as I don't make excuses and just make it a priority I "Just Do It". 

My sleep has improved tremendously, well more like waking up improved, I have never had sleep problems. I wake up not tired and much earlier, without the alarm.

Something Dr. B. said in her blog or book (or both) really touched me. She said that she is 60 (or something near that age) now and it seems like just 2 weeks ago she was 45. So she has no illusions, she will be 80 in no time. I look at both our parents (my husband's and mine), they all have health problems, they can barely walk (they are 83/84). They didn't exercise until they retired and even then it was just walking. Our moms never drove a car so they always walked to work and/or store, bus etc. 
I watch other people near that age at our Synagogue, they are active, they actually exercise, they have vitality! I know I cannot plan that far ahead but I want to give myself a fair chance. 

Thoughts about quantities of food

I have been thinking a lot in the past few days about quantity. Dr. Berkley says that the quantity of food you eat in maintenance doesn't change drastically from the amount you ate while losing weight. 

When I was on Medifast/TSFL it was one of the first things I learned that the quantities I always thought normal and healthy are actually gigantic!

I remember visiting my cousin in The Netherlads gazillions years ago, when I was still young and single, in my early 30s, she had breakfast and a sandwich for lunch her main meal was dinner. I thought back then that she eats very little. Little did I know that she actually was more in the right direction than the three big meals plus snacks and endless lattes that I was eating. I never thought my coffee with low fat/non fat milk 3 and sometimes 4 times a day was contributing to my growing appetite and body.

I am trying to decide now if I am eating too little or too much and of what. I haven't been able to lose any weight in the past month. It is disappointing. When I was doing Medifast/TSFL I had a set routine. It was easy and pretty much predictable. I usually dropped about 2lbs a week unless it was the week of my period. I stalled here and there,when I got closer to 135 and the last 5lbs from 135 to 130 were very s l o w. I was doing C25K then and had to up my protein. 

I now have a good idea of the reasonable quantity of food for my body. There is that much meat/figs/eggs I can eat a day. So that's my protein and it is hard to overeat. It is actually sometimes hard to eat enough (if you go by Pinney/Volek/McDomald 40g recommended protein per meal). My other food staple veggies, are also not likely to cause overeating. Another point is that I eat from a salad plate, I fill it with protein and veggies. That's it. 

I do it 3 times a day. Hard to overeat. But..... There are nuts. I am not sure I overeat them. I am not sure they are the ones stalling me. I have had weight loss after I ate more than my usual nuts. I do eat small quantity 1 or 2 oz max. I had days when I didn't eat them at all and still didn't lose. 

Perhaps my body is still adopting to Keto. I am not sure. Perhaps it is hormones. Perhaps I am in peri menopause. 

Time will tell. 

I was down to my usual 147.4lbs this morning after yesterday's 149+. I remember that when I did cardio training I was advised not to weigh in the day after and thought perhaps my running had something to do with the scale gain. I now make sure to walk on days that I don't run. I do feel great! I will continue to figure it out.

Refuse to Regain

If the cultural forces that overwhelm us with food are like a flood, we must respond in kind. 

Dr. Barbara Berkley rule 1, avoid moderation.

Chapter 10 in Dr. B's book is very powerful for me. I also relate to her notion that the food attack and S foods are worse than drugs because drugs are not advertised and pushed on us on daily basis. Drugs are not mainstream while S foods are considered 'normal'. 

These are things I already know but she put it in good perspective for me. Now that I have associated it with drugs it is even easier to look at all the baked goods and desserts. 

My new strategy is plugging everything into My Fitness Pal. I am in the zone and in the flow. 

I think it has become a habit. For example I was at Starbucks Yesterday and tried the new Flat White. I plugged it in MFP and made sure to adjust the macros for the rest of my day. 

I don't like it BTW. Don't feel the coffee, it is basically whole milk. I will go back to my Americano with TBS of heavy whipping cream or just plain black. Maybe an occasional cappuccino. 

Who needs all this milk?

I think that I don't. Even though my nutriens where fine yesterday and I took a nice walk with my daughter I woke up this morning with 3 extra pounds! I got very upset when I saw 149+ on the scale. 

I am suspecting all this milk didn't do good to me. This is when 'a calorie is a calorie' proves wrong. I had 25g net carbs (47 total and 22fiber), 69g fat and 96g protein. 

My hormones are probably also contributing to the mix. I finally got my period after missing a month. 

I am just going to stick with my food template minus the milk and make adjustments. I will not reduce calories if anything I will slowly increase them. Especially now that I am doing the C25K. Running is great. My sleep is better just after one day of running. I am going to run again today. 

I will end this post with a recipe for a great carb free toast that someone on Ketogenic Dieters group on  FB posted:

1/4 cup golden flax meal

1 egg

1/2 tsp baking powder

2 tbsp water

pinch of salt

Mix and cook in microwave for 2 min. (I used a short mug, you can use a silicone bagel/donut mold), slice and toast

190 calories, 14g fat, 8g fiber, 12g protein 0 carbs

Add low fat meat and veggies and you have a great portable meal. 

I had it yesterday for lunch with leftover turkey hamburger as I needed to run out of the house to drive my daughter to piano lesson.

Off to run now. 

Surprising loss and first step to healthy lifestyle

This morning I stepped on the scale and saw a nice surprise. 3lbs loss. I couldn't believe it so stepped again, this time it was 2lbs loss only. I began to think something must be wrong with my scale so I tried few more time and moved the scale around but it was the same. So I am officially 2lbs down. Right after nuts disaster yesterday. 

I got up and went for a walk/jog, well basically I am back to C25K. I did a little less walking and a bit more short runs. After 3 sets of 1 minute I was getting slow so I ran 3 more 30 sec sets and walked in between. I got home streched and did some push ups just to work my arms. Enough with laziness and excuses. I don't like the gym but I have excercise videos at home, I spent the money on them and I need it. No more excuses. No more complaints in my head about how boring it is. Most of my day consists of driving so I just have to do it. That's it! Enough!

My husband decided to compete with me :-) he said that if I run he will too. So now he is out on a walk/run. He pushes himself more than I do but I remember it is very good for both of us. I think it affects our hormone levels for the better. 

Anyhow, Time for breakfast now and keep reading Refuse to Regain  :-) 

Ketogenic diet thoughts

I was doing pretty well or at least so I thought but after lunch I started to feel deprived. I couldn't stop thinking about nuts. I ended up giving up, resentment was starting to set in. I ended up eating nuts and a small pack of beef jerky. I skipped dinner and only had a slice if Swiss cheese, cucumber and quarter tomatoe. 

I went for a short jog and walk in the evening and am drinking hot tea. I decided to stop pursuing ketosis. I will go back to just protein, fat and low carb just from veggies and berries and keep track of my food on MFP. 40g protein is a lot and 20g carbs is too low for me. I want to be able to eat my veggies. I feel really deprived limiting food such as tomatoes and cauliflower. It is not sustainable for me and triggers emotional response so it seems. 

So my first non Whole 30 food was Swiss cheese. 

A bit of TMI...I am having gas. I suspect it is from the nuts. 

I am browsing through Dr. Barbara Berkley blogs and really found this one interesting. My main learning is to become an athlete. I am going back to walking/running. I am turning 46 in less then 2 months I have to establish this habit and keep it going. Especially since I still have menopause ahead. 

http://www.refusetoregain.com/2013/01/practical-weight-guidance-for-the-menopausally-challenged.html

Whole 30 Day 30 Is it the END?

Yesterday was the last day of The Whole 30, can't believe 30 days passed already. It was a piece of cake! It is not hard at all to eat a clean diet. What is hard is to keep quantities. Here's what i ate yesterday. No 100% chocolate and no nuts. I was totally fine. No hunger just a couple of times, the old times for snacks i wanted something to eat. like in the afternoon around 4:30/5 pm and in the evening around 9pm.
Something strange is going on with me. It doesn't happen after breakfast, mainly after lunch. I finish my meal and even though I am pretty full and satiated I want something to eat. so in the past I have eaten chocolate but do i really need it? I would like to eat that 1-2 squares of chocolate a couple times a week but I am not sure i want to eat them daily on a habitual basis, which I have been doing. Yesterday I had a little under 1200 calories but I was not hungry at all. I hit all my macros and just didn't want to eat anything else, well i did WANT but my body was perfectly fine and happy.
With dinner I don't usually want to eat after i finish my meal but sometimes when i sit down around 9 pm and my husband munches i feel like i want something too. I usually deal with this by making a cup of tea. Sometimes i do eat like 1oz of nuts.
But i don't want to snack like this any more.

I was at a social event yesterday at noon and they served a very nice catered lunch with hummus, salads, falafel, bread of course, puffs, muffins, brownies, cut veggies, cut fruit, dates......etc. There was absolutely no protein (unless you count the falafel and hummus as protein although nutritionally it is not a complete protein as they are partial amino acid chain). I was a bit distracted but I was still full from my breakfast. I had the thought of having just cucumbers but then reminded myself that even cucumbers have carbs and that I was not really hungry and it was not time for my lunch. So i just kept drinking tea. I went home and had my lunch when i was hungry. I did take 2 muffins and brownies for my kids..... wouldn't want them to throw everything ;-)

Today is the first day I am not on The Whole 30 anymore but i still haven't changed much. My weight is still the same didn't suddenly drop ;-) I am suspecting my body is adjusting to the new macros switching from high fat to higher protein and lower carbs. I will give it 2 weeks. Now that I started to figure out the food template for my recommended macros I really want to be consistent for 2 weeks. I really want to get a handle on my nuts and dark chocolate habit. I have significantly lowered my fat intake. Need to see that indeed my body will start dropping weight once my fat intake in grams is lower than my protein intake. Also trying to figure out what protein sources to eat so i get enough protein (120g) and try not to have any carbs in it so i can get my carbs from veggies only.

Here's my breakfast today visually and nutritionally. I will not eat Turkey Bacon very often. It is too expensive and the same goes for the smoked salmon (which also has carbs!). Both bacon and salmon were too salty for me. I think i will make my own turkey/chicken breakfast sausages and freeze them. although I really like AppleGate Farms chicken apple sausages they do cost more than what I will make myself and I think I do not need to apple sweetening and can save these carbs by making them nyself. I will have a box or 2 in the freezer for emergency. Otherwise it just seems that my previous breakfast which included 2 or 3 eggs and vegetables had too many carbs and not enough protein.

Accomplishments:

1. I have gotten into the habit of logging my food on MFP which is really good. 
2. I stopped snacking between meals, mainly between lunch and dinner. 
3. I have more control over what i eat. I actually choose what and when to eat, more often than not. Once in a while i still give in and munch on nuts (like on Wednesday) but the frequency is decreasing. I am not tempted by available/free food at social gatherings. I am more conscious of the unclean ingredients even in the salads (like tuna salad is probably made with cheap mayo loaded with soy oil, salad dressing loaded with unthinkable ingredients). 
4. I finally started to understand what to eat to get to the macros I aim for. 
5. My skin cleared up, almost completely. Before I started the Whole 30 I had a bad breakout on my chin (my oily area). Had another breakout while that one was disappearing but it was smaller and i immediately treated it with sulfur cream. It is now almost gone and I hope not to have any new ones any time soon. I suspect that it was a result of too much fat. 

What I would like to change next 

I would like to focus on the wanting/needed to eat "something" right after I finish my lunch. This is when I got into the habit of having chocolate and/or nuts as part of my lunch. I thought I will trick myself if i incorporate it in my lunch so i don't feel like snacking in the afternoon. But it is not exactly a nutritional must since I can get my nutrients from my actual food. 

I am still not sure how to handle this one but i will give it a thought. 

Whole 30 Day 29

Yesterday went by fairly easy. The only problem was in the evening, after I had dinner, I was down from interaction with my husband and although I was full from my beef stew I snarfed some nuts that I had with me in my purse. 

It is not included here below on MFP log..... 

Today I am up a pound!!!!! Even though I ate pretty well for few days. 
I don't think these nuts were to blame here. I think it is connected to my hormones as I haven't gotten my period this month and this morning I think it is finally coming ...... i am probably retaining something. I plan on exercising today and just keep doing what I am doing. 
I finally managed to hit my macros as recommended by the FB Keto Dieters group I am on. 120g protein (40g x 3) 71g fat and 20g net carbs. 
Yesterday i finally managed to eat 18g net carbs, 120g protein and 69g fat. 
I know i have more than that because of the nuts and coconut flakes binge in the car....but at least now I know what i need to eat to hit those macros. 

I am probably better off staying away from nuts.... seems like they are trigger food for me. As Barbara Berkeley recommends in her book Refuse To Regain, it is better to have a total abstention from trigger foods and then introduce them back very carefully..... I will probably need to plan carefully the nuts in my daily nutrition.  Calculate the macros and check that they fit in my daily plan or else NOT EAT THEM! 

On a different note, I heard a very interesting interview on NPR yesterday 
http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2015/01/28/381622350/why-teens-are-impulsive-addiction-prone-and-should-protect-their-brains 

Never realized that addiction is a form of learning. I wonder how do we "un-learn"? My daughter is still 11 but already showing teenager signs....she does a really good eye roll ;-) 

And a final note. Today is my last day of Whole 30!!!!! 
It has been completely uneventful and simple journey. I do not miss anything, especially not dairy or sugar. 
I will now go back to buyer my regular lower cost ghee (the one I got for the Whole 30) is Organic while the regular one I buy at Trader Joe's is not organic. 
Will i change anything tomorrow? I don't think so. 
I think that cheese and dairy do not fill me as protein sources. 

I am really enjoying not having any cravings. I am enjoying knowing I am making good food choices. 

I sat in a board meeting last night and on the table where pretzels, 2 types of cookies and water. Of course i didn't touch them (I came with my own BIG cup of herbal cinnamon tea and sipped it for like 2 hours) and I wasn't even tempted. People munched on everything. I remember the days when I couldn't resist those pretzels and think "how much harm could it be eating just a few" but after having one i wanted another one and another and it became harder to stop nibbling them, sometimes i would just give up and just eat and eat. 
There is never a good source of protein anywhere. It is much more expensive than the cheap wheat/grain/sugar snack..... 

Oh well. I believe I will just keep eating this way as I am enjoying it. If i do want heavy whipping cream in my coffee once in a while (once/twice a week) or whole milk at Starbucks I will have it (I will not buy it to have at home as it will become a regular thing that i don't want) but the rest? Not even sure how to incorporate cheese/greek yogurt in my nutrition now. Protein is too low and carbs too high..... Somehow the dairy never fills me especially melted cheese, I just want more.... ;-) 

I am sure i will figure it out with time. But for now I am focused on dropping my extra weight and finding my way to do it. 

Whole 30 Days 27 and 28

I didn't have time to blog yesterday, well technically I did but I tried to do a screen shot from MFP and it didn't work so I tried for half an hour to figure it out until I gave up..... 
Today I was able to figure out a way to do it although the PrtSc worked just a couple days ago it isn't working now even after restart.....go figure. 

I am trying to get my macros right and am not having much success so far. I need 1200 cal, 120g protein, 71g fat and 20g net carbs. 

I don't know what protein source to eat that will keep me at 40g per meal but at ~23g fat and very low carb. All my regular sources seem higher on fat and/or carb. I also realize that I need to limit my vegetables, especially tomatoes. 
I am at 31-35 g net carbs. 
I also want my food to still taste good though..... 

I am happy i was able to log my food on MFP. I will have to keep monitoring and figure things out. 

Tomorrow will be the last day of my Whole 30!!!! I like eating this way. The only change i might have is to eat frozen grilled chicken, somehow it always has sugar or some additive that is not Whole 30 approved. 
I still haven't decided if i will go back to dairy. I actually feel pretty good and am not sure i want to change anything. 
I was looking into Fage Greek yogurt this morning to figure out macros, the 2% one has 20g of protein but also 8g carbs and 0 fiber so I am not sure i will eat it since I will still have to consume additional 15-20g protein more fiber but no more carbs. Not sure what it is i can eat to provide fiber without carbs. Also 8g carbs seems a little high for since it will require me to have less carbs in my other 2 meals. 

The good news are that i have no problem not snacking. That was an easy habit to instil. After the initial sabotage last week, this week is no problem. I am over snacking! I eat my nuts and 100% chocolate as part of my meal. 
I don't need any cream in my afternoon decaf coffee so I will probably not go back to my old habit of having afternoon decaff coffee with 1tbs of heavy whipping cream (or coconut milk). 

Another good thing that I figured out since logging my food religiously is that I don't get enough protein in but get too much fat. 

I am feeling great, am not hungry or tired. Will measure ketones tomorrow again. Wondering if anything will change? 

Whole 30 Day 26

I finally managed to operate the Ketone meter. Had to do it several times as didn't get enough blood out and got error message (arghhh wasted like 3 strips). As i suspected I am not in ketosis. Measured 0.8

Here's my eating from yesterday. Doesn't seem like carbs are my problem since I am at 27g net carbs and under 50g total carbs. Looks like i am pretty much ok with protein and fat too. I suspect I am eating too many calories in total? So I need to reduce my fat (like Paleo mayonaise) and focus more on lean protein. 

I have been following a great Keto Dieters group on FB and they focus on The Art and Science of Low Carbohydrate Living http://www.amazon.com/The-Art-Science-Carbohydrate-Living/dp/0983490708 as well as Lyle McDonalds The Ketogenic Diet. 
Very scientific and proof oriented approach. 

According to this group my macros for weight loss should be 40g protein for each one of 3 meals, total of 71g fat, up to 20g net carbs and 1199 calories (which is where MFP puts me 1200 cal). 

I realized that my 2 or even 3 eggs breakfast in tbs ghee with veggies and half avocado doesn't provide enough protein but does include way too much fat. so i am going to change that with using much much less fat for my eggs and adding meat or fish and probably removing the avocado. The eggs have enough fat.... 

I got carried away with all the LCHF movement and lack of specific info. The Diet doctor and Atkins say don't pay attention to how much you eat as long as it is protein, fat, veggies but it doesn't seem so. I spend some time reading Lyle McDonald's "The Ketogenic Diet" and realized that it does matter how much one eats. 
I also am getting better at not snacking and keeping just 3 meals a day. 

I need to drink more water. 
Be very careful with nuts, coconut oil, coconut butter, coconut flakes. 
Log everything at least for few weeks just so i know where I am. Especially if i want to get anywhere with my weight loss. 

I still don't understand how I am not in ketosis. I suspected it but now i know.   

Whole 30 Day 25 still working on forming new habits.....

Yesterday was day twenty five! Which makes today day 26 and leaves me with only 4 days left. Time just flew by! 

I spent the whole day reading, watching figure skating nationals and cooking chicken breast. Well, I didn't do much with chicken breast. Just seasoned with salt put in slow cooker with Imagine chicken broth and homemade BBQ sauce (recipe from It Starts With Food or Nom Nom Paleo don't remember) and cooked on high for like 8.5-9 hours. Then I just shredded using 2 forks. It is yummy. My new favorite. 

For breakfast I had 2 eggs scrambled with mushrooms and leftover grilled plum tomatoes in tbs ghee with half avocado. 

Then for lunch my husband brought in yesterday's mail where was 100% chocolate I ordered on Amazon but it melted so I put it in foil and tucked in fridge. After an hour it was really good and I added few pieces to my beef sloppy joe with cucumber and lettuce. I was done but still wanted to eat. Tried to figure out if I was truly  hungry or just emotionally wanted to eat, but I did grab few nuts. Very few. I did feel full few minutes later. 

I drank all day, water and tea and didn't snack until dinner. For dinner I cut cucumber, bell pepper and tomatoe and had it with pulled chicken. It was very good but again I wanted more when I finished eating. I think it is more psychological than physical. I had a tbs of coconut butter and just drank water. After few minutes I was full. It is interesting I am feeling satiety only after breakfast. After lunch/dinner it usually takes about 15 min to feel full. 

During the day I read a chapter in Refuse to Regain. Metabolism. Still not sure about this chapter. What she says is that we are all different. The same foods and amounts will be digested differently by different people because of each one's metabolism. Well, that's obvious. 

The key learning for me from this chapter is that our bodies need to be moving for our metabolism to work. 

I also read Fit2Fat2Fit by Drew Manning. Got this little book on buck book sale. It was a quick read. This guy, a health and fitness nut and personal trainer did an experiment for a year. He decided to take 6 months to stop excercising and eat a standard American diet, then 6 month to get back into shape. He gained 75lbs. 

One of the key takes from his book (and weight loss registry) is that you need a supporting community in order to successfully drop weight and maintain. It really resonates with me. When I was on Medifast I did really well when I blogged daily and participated in online discussions on the MF board. Supporting others and getting support from others was really a life save for me. I knew I wasn't alone. Somehow I didn't get this feeling when I was in WW back in 2007. 

So now I am following Gwen and Karen and am on 2 Keto FB groups. I believe it is just what I need. 

Another key learning for me from this little book is that you do need a certain amount of discipline and dedication. Only one meal at a time. One choice at a time. Not even a day. Just this minute. This step. 

I knew it already from my couch to 5k training from two years ago. I only need to make the right choice right at this minute. Not decide about future. Just now. 

And it feels great! 

Looking back is rewarding but looking ahead is daunting and discouraging.

I am able to maintain but not lose weight. I know I will figure it out. I might be eating too much or too little. Need to track my food and measure portions in order to figure it out. 

I suspect that nuts are not so good for me. I had some breakouts this week. It is probably the fat/omega 6 in nuts? Not sure what causes my skin to break out. It wasn't too bad. It might even be hormones. 

Whole 30 Day 24 nothing new

Yesterday went as usual. I decided to go with 2 eggs for breakfast as I don't see any
 difference between two and three eggs. I am full equally and rather to have less eggs. So had a 2 egg omelette in tbs ghee with mushrooms and cherry tomatoes + half avocado plus some raspberries. I was pretty good and had sloppy joe with Israeli salad and lettuce for lunch. But then I grabbed nuts and chocolate. The 100% chocolate is fine but I didn't really need the nuts. Sabotage..... I want to get it in my head, no more nuts. I should stop buying them and storing on my shelf. 

For dinner I had a hard boiled egg with Applegate breakfast chicken Apple patties, cucumber, orange and yello pepper and home made baba ganush (recipe from Well Fed 1). 

I am back to reading Refuse to Regain chapter 8 discussing metabolism. 

Whole 30 Day 23 slight slip but generally getting better

Yesterday was day 23. Time really flies! This is totally doable as a way of life. I still haven't decided if I will still eat dairy after I finish The Whole 30. Should i go back to my Fage 2% or full fat with 1oz nuts for breakfast? Should I do it twice a week or only once? I am not tired of eggs for breakfast but it might get boring after a while. 
I think it is ok for me. I will give it a try in a week and see how i feel. I think that once a week will not be problematic for me. 

As I mentioned yesterday, i slipped with pistachios after my breakfast. I was listening to a book on tape and just let myself have a handful of pistachios that somehow grew into two handfuls and then few more. 
I know that it was wrong. They looked at me from the shelf. I should have just closed the door. I shouldn't have looked on that shelf to begin with. I should have just left the kitchen. Looking back it seems like self sabotage. I would have been better off going out for a walk. 
Which is another thing i really want to focus on. Daily walks. I am completely sedentary. I really need to move. It is not good for my health in any way. I am not aiming currently at running again or even getting back to T-Tapp or Callanetics or even dance workout. My excuse for quitting every workout I start is getting bored. It becomes monotone. I went on a walk with a friend on Tuesday but didn't really do much the rest of the week. 
I have to MOVE!!!!!! My body wants it. The whole "I am bored" is self sabotage and I have to just stop doing it. 

After I slipped with pistachios I had my beef sloppy joe for lunch with 2 squares of dark chocolate. I learned from Karen (GardenGirlKP blog) to incorporate 'treats' like berries and chocolate in my meal, I will do so with nuts too. I believe it will help eliminate my snacking mentality. If the food is part of the meal i do not need to snack between meals. 

I had my afternoon decaf coffee without coconut milk and was fine. 
By dinner time, around 7 I was ready to eat but not famishing. I had a hardboiled egg, with persian cucumber and yellow bell pepper, 4 Applegate Apple chicken sausages. I was still a little hungry (well, i am not sure if it was hunger or wanting some more food) so I had 1oz of beef jerky (I like Sophia's Survival Food) and called it a night with a cup of herbal tea. 

I am really inspired by Gwen from The Sunny Coconut. She is so committed. Thanks Gwen for commenting on my blog. Please feel free to be direct with me. No need to apologize. I want to hear the truth. 

Yes I realize that new habits take time to establish. I am committed and am in the mindset of changing. I think that i always had this pattern of realizing a damaging habit, wanting to change it, making the change few times or just once and then slipping. I have learned that it is normal. A couple years ago I read this book The Power of Habit http://charlesduhigg.com/the-power-of-habit/ and the author does say that people always slip. It is a game of few steps forward few steps back. You want more steps forward than back and with time the backward steps become less and less. 

I have never been good at setting goals and sticking to them. I actually do much worse when I set goals. But what works for me is just having a mindset. I also like to be different. So if i see others doing the same thing I want to stop doing it motivates me to stop doing it..... ;-) I like to be different. 

So here it is. Everybody snacks. I don't want to do it. ;-) 

Whole 30 Day 22 - changing snacking mentality

Yesterday and Tuesday I focused on being conscious and stopping my habit of snacking.

Gwen from The Sunny Coconut suggested that I might be programmed to snack which really is true for me. Yesterday I have been reading a lot on this topic in Keto Diet FB group I am on. They were saying exactly the same. For weight loss they promote no snacking, 3 meals, spaced at least 4hours apart,  sufficient  protein and fat, not unlimited eat more fat if you want to snack. Snacking is a state of mind. 

On Tuesday I was determined and did not snack all day even though I did want to, not out of hunger. Yesterday, Wednesday, I had my breakfast around 11 am and knew I wouldn't be hungry for a while. I considered IFing till dinner. But around 3/4 pm I did not hold up. My head gave in. I reasoned I will have a handful of nuts and it will be my lunch. It seems now like bad reasoning. 

It is. It is part of old brain, old bad habit. I don't expect it to go away or change in a day. But I am working on it.

Dinner yesterday was beef sloppy joe with lettuce and Israeli salad. Did not snack at night. 

Today though, ate pistachios after breakfast. It is like I am rebelling, sensing that I am about to change. But I am determined. It feels better to just eat 3 meals a day. 

No more snacking today.

Whole 30 Day 21 thoughts about weight loss

I started the day with 2 eggs and mushrooms cooked in ghee and half of small avocado. 

I also cooked 6 hard boiled eggs. Just to have something handy for everybody around here.

Yesterday I ordered 10 packs of Sophia's Survival Food Beef Jerky, I always have one pack in my purse for emergency, and 100% chocolate bars from Amazon (about 4 different ones). This supply should be enough for a month. I also ordered Red Boat Fish sauce. Nom Nom Paleo uses it a lot and I wanted to try it. 

I heard of this one day deal of weight loss books for 0.99 cent

http://buckbooks.net/nonfiction/ Purchased a couple of them and searched the internet extensively for Paleo weight loss blogs.

I am not losing weight. I am eating too much, I am thinking about food too much and yet I am eating a healthy diet. 

All I need to do is set some eating boundaries, stop snacking (especially nuts), reduce my meal size, no more eating while watching TV or in front of computer. 

Paleo Non Paleo www.paleononpaleo.com had a great post today on learning from overeating. So this is what I will do. Have strategies and do something else before I grab food. If I still want to snack I will do it and not beat myself up but only after I:

1) drink

2) call someone

3) go online and blog or read a blog

4) if possible go out for a walk, even if it is short around the house

Whole 30 Day 20 + Refuse to Regain thoughts

I am catching up ..... today is day 20. By now I already have the hang of it. I am feeling great, have no cravings and am not really missing anything. Not even dairy or my Fage Greek yogurt that I got used to eating for breakfast on the go. I am not missing the Heavy Whipping Cream in my afternoon coffee. I am not missing the little cream cheese I was eating nor the hard mozzarella cheese. I think I will stay away from them even after I complete Whole 30. It saves money, shortens my shopping list, saves space in my fridge and eliminates foodification and focus on food. It boils down to - when I have the variety I eat it. so if I am happy without it why bother? 
Same logic worked for me with regards to grains. I am enjoying coconut milk in my coffee so why bother with heavy whipping cream? 
I think I can have the cream at Starbucks sometimes.


I went back to Barbara Berkeley and the book Refuse to Regain. Chapter 7 was very interesting for me and I read it several times. I like the term S foods (S = sugar, starch). She is basically saying that even whole wheat/grain foods are not real foods as they have been grinded and not in their natural form and it is much better to eat the food in it's natural form (like veggies or meat). Also, they eventually translate into sugar in blood. 

What really resonated with me is her saying "Experimentation often leads to maintenance disaster because, whatever its source, we can't seem to say no to food that is starchy or sweet. " 
This is what basically happened to me gradually during these past 2 years and 15-17lbs. 

She says that S foods are newcomers to the human diet and thus are not essential. I tend to agree. 

I really enjoyed her short review of how our world became so super sweet. It is a short history on how sugar entered into our society and became such a huge industry. Even though I know these things it was still a good reinforcement to read it again in her language. 

This morning I cooked 2 eggs in 1 tbs ghee with shredded zucchini and mushrooms and 2 Applegate chicken sage sausages. I forgot and didn't need the avocado. Since I was thinking about food and am not busy I just had a handful of almonds while watching the figure skating nationals (kids from our rink are competing now). This is something I need to address and change. 

I need a new strategy for dealing with just wanting to eat. I am not hungry, not at all. Yet I allowed myself to eat nuts. 

For lunch I plan to have the bison sloppy joe I made yesterday with lettuce, cucumber and bell pepper. It is almost noon, I am not hungry and since I just had some nuts I shouldn't be hungry for a while. I don't want to eat just because it is lunch time. Of course I will need to feed my kids since they are off school. 
I still haven't figured out what to have for dinner. I would like ideally to IF lunch and just have my planned lunch for dinner. 
I need to lower my food intake if i want to lose weight. It is strange but I lose weight without effort and tend to eat less when I am busy, moving and active. 
I've got to change my focus from food to just getting out of the house and busy. 
Gosh, it is hard to be a stay-at-home mom!!!! There are other challenges when both parents are working but staying home does not come without it's own challenges. 

Whole 30 Day 19

That was yesterday. Again, had 3 egg omelette for breakfast with a tomato cooked in ghee. 
Had tuna salad for lunch as I didn't have anything ready. It is a fast and easy option. 1 can of tuna in water, 1 hard boiled egg if i have one, heart of palm, pickle, home made mayo (finally finished my first batch). 
Again, I am still set on Pavlovian schedule and had my chocolate and some nuts in the afternoon. I am going to focus on changing this mentality. Gwen from The Sunny Coconut pointed out yesterday that it might be just my knee jerk mindset for snacking in the afternoon and it completely resonated with me. 

I am afraid that I got used to eating 6 times a day when I was on MF. Since I was eating much less fat and protein. Now that I eat more fat and protein I don't need to eat anything between breakfast and lunch, I can't, I am so full after my eggs cooked in ghee and if I eat 1/2 avocado too I am completely full for hours. Lunch is different for some reason. In my mind I have to have something between lunch and dinner and many times after dinner.
MF mentality. I think that with lunch, I might not have enough fat and/or protein and perhaps I eat too fast. I will start to eat more slowly and see how that works for me. Since the chocolate that I eat now is 100% chocolate, I see it as fat, perhaps I can replace it with some additional fat in my lunch or just include it as part of my lunch. I am also a creature of habit in the evening. My husband snacks a lot after dinner and it totally triggers me sometimes. I need to create new habits and be conscious. I will work on it and update.

As to dinner yesterday I made sloppy joe from ground Bison. I use a recipe by Maria 
http://mariamindbodyhealth.com/sloppy-joes-and-manwich-facts/

I do not use Swerve (although I was very excited to find it yesterday at Sprouts Market!!! so I don't need to order it on Amazon) or Stevia instead I used about a tbs of organic unsweetened apple sauce. I also added Cacao Nibs. 

I ate it in lettuce leaves. Really good. 

Whole 30 Day 18

I am catching up. Today's post is about today.

I posted my two years transformation story regarding food and nutrition. Few months ago I realized that all the wonderful Paleo recipes are healthier than the flour ones but they are all still problematic. At least for me. They might be working for all these wonderful bloggers like Elana's Pantry, Practical Paleo, The Paleo Mom, The Paleo Parents and so on but for me, a stay-at-home mom, with little time and a family that doesn't want to give up grains and hates the smell of coconut oil, who doesn't exercise and prefer simple and fast food with as little cleaning as possible cooking like this doesn't work. 

I realized that seeing all these recipes in my inbox and FB feed just kept me in an unhealthy food centric mode.

I unsubscribed from ALL the blogs and FB feeds. I cook the same things anyway and enjoy them. I have a good variety and have no complaints. When I want something new I go to these blogs and search for recipes. It,works much better for me. 

Now I really want to figure out how to drop the 15-17 lbs I gained during all the foodification I went through, perhaps even keep on to dropping 3-5lbs more and get into the 120s like my new friend Gwen. 

I think the key for me would be to get busy. I need to change my focus from food to life. 

I think I got the grip with food. I can and will live like this. No tiramisu is more important than sticking to my healthy weight and not having cravings. I am actually pretty happy with my 100% chocolate. I do not need or want any sweets. I am not feeling deprived. 

I learned that I love many healthy foods, like almond butter for example, but I do not feel satisfied after eating just one or two tbs. I don't know how many I need to feel full but why bother? I would rather chew the almonds. For me, almond butter is foodification. Why is it a Paleo food? Wouldn't our ancestors just eat almonds? It is also cheaper. Why work and make the butter? It's only needed for my kids who have braces or people who cannot chew/bite. 

So I am not going there any more. 

I came across this article/video today, a talk by Michael Pollan, and really got thinking about how important it is to make food myself. It is something I know but just now it is a bit more clear.

http://www.trueactivist.com/mcdonalds-transparency-campaign-backfires-prepare-to-be-shocked/

As,to my eating today, it has been again omelette for breakfast. For lunch I was at a Bat Mizvah and took just a tbs of tuna salad, few slices of cucumber, few capers, blueberries and a strawberry. I came home a little hungry but not terribly and finished my sloppy joe. 

I have this new habit, it seems like after I finish my lunch I am not satisfied. I am not even sure if it is psychological or physical. I just want something more. Have been eating a square or two of 100% chocolate but I am not sure it's a good habit. I need to figure it out. Where does this emptiness come from?

It is evening, I had a hard boiled egg and Applegate chicken sausage. I still want something to eat but not sure if I am hungry. Am fixing myself chai will add coconut milk to it. 

I would like to reduce my calories hoping it will help me lose weight but am not sure. Need to start using the glucose and Keto meter I got. Hope it will give me a better clue about my body chemistry.

Day 17 Thoughts about foodification

I started my journey to healthy eating through Medifast. It's funny, my eating transformed just like I quit smoking 15 years ago. I did not intend to do it. It just happened. I started Medifast just to support my husband. He ended up not doing it. I did it. Initially I just wanted to lose the weight and then eat whatever I want in moderation. After few months on Medifast I discovered the online community and throught the wonderful people there got into a mindset of health. I got Dr. A's book Habits of Health and intended to keep his recommended lifestyle. 3 meals and 3 snacks a day, 1/4 plate carbs/starch, preferably whole grain, 1/4 plate protein, 1/2 plate veggies. Medifast meals or other meal replacement brands for snack on the go, fruit paired with protein. 

When I was already at healthy weight I read Wheat Belly, through one of the recommendations on MF board. I was shocked! I read a little bit more about it. Gary Taubes, Grain Brain then I heard about Paleo. I decided I really like living without grains. It was hard for me to eat in moderation. Even brown rice, whole wheat pasta or whole wheat bread and oatmeal. I always wanted to eat more then the measured portion on my plate. Which meant for me, always having to rely on discipline and will. It works sometimes but not 100%. 

So I decided, since I don't miss grains at all, they aren't good for me and it makes life so much easier to just eliminate them from my life. I am not attached to them and already went through withdrawal so why bother with them? I went through several phases. Breakfast was the most interesting to figure out as lunch and dinner are easygoing to eat protein and veggies breakfast still was in my head a meal that needed grains like oatmeal, muffins, pancakes, waffles.

There are so many recipes out there. 

I made many of them. They tasted great. But I could not control my portions. Gradually the weight crept up. Then there where sweets at public events. I allowed myself to have just the cream from the tiramisu. Cravings. Appetite. Self judgement. Bad mood. Clothes starting to be tight. That doesn't feel good. But now I will never go back to MF. So I don't know how to lose weight without the MF system. I need something new. 

I will continue this thread tomorrow.

In the meanwhile my day was good. I had my omelette with shredded zucchini and half avocado. For lunch I had my sloppy joe with cucumber. I also hadn 2 squares of 100% chocolate. And then nuts. 

Drank afternoon decaf coffee with 1tbs of coconut milk. 

For dinner I had 3 Applegate Chicken Apple patties with roasted tomatoes, eggplant and cauliflower. 

The scale is around the same numbers. But I feel my body shrinking. I was wearing my Style & Co size 4 tight leg jeans and they were comfortable not tight. I am sure I am not gaining muscle as I am not exercising. Very interesting.....

Day 16

Another day gone by.

I am half way through. 

I can feel my pants getting more comfortable but the scale is still the same.

I think I should remove all nuts and reduce breakfast in order to lose. Still haven't measured blood glucose.....

Made yummy sloppy joe today added cocoa nibs and it is absolutely tasty. Great dinner with cherry tomatoes, cucumbers and bell pepper.

For breakfast had eggs, avocado, mushrooms, cherry tomatoes. 

Snack nuts, chocolate.

Lunch Applegate chicken patty x 3, pickles, cherry tomatoes. 

I was pretty gull today. 

Whole 30 Day 15

Catching up with yesterday, Wednesday. Again, no problem with food. I was busy all morning so had my usual eggs with avocado and veggies at noon.  Had some raspberries. Snacked a bit during the day on some nuts, 100% chocolate, coconut butter and coconut flakes, had tea with almond milk and then had dinner at evening, leftover chicken and steamed cauliflower and broccoli with my fresh made BBQ sauce (made a new batch quickly yesterday for dinner). 

I am feeling pretty good. This is totally sustainable way of living for me. I am not missing anything. I totally love the 100% chocolate. 

These are the brands that I got to try on www.chocosphere.com. Francois Pralus Le 100% Criollo, The Grenada Chocolate and Domori. The last one is not my favorite but the first two are great. The only problem is that they are pricey! Nearly $10 each! I only eat 1-2 squares a day though and do not get carried away. 

Another snack I really like is beef jerky from Sophia's Survival Food. Again great but a bit pricey at $3.99 for 1oz. 

I wish I was not on the run so much.... :-) but that's how life is. 

I really liked the Quest bars, they were convenient and cheaper but seems like I am doing much better without them. No acne and cravings. I think that after I complete Whole 30 I will limit the bars to just up to 2 a week only if in crisis, like next month on a ski trip to Tahoe or when I travel.